She Knew

She came to yell, to ask what was between us. She sounded pissed. She wanted to know why we stood outside talking the other night; I told her it was nothing. Of course, I denied it. I called later and sold that lie we practised. She seemed to buy it.

She was paranoid; she sat for a while to collect her thoughts then she asked more questions.

Man, she said it started that day she saw me try to kiss you. I said that was two months ago, I don’t remember such. It could have been anything; maybe a lip brush before a hug.

I know I was meant to stir clear from her friends; an advice sounded to me. I got too comfortable with you.

I admit. I found you beautiful the moment I saw you. Yeah, I remember that day. You were in tiger-stripes spaghetti and wine bum shorts, lean frame, slender arms and thighs big enough to show support to your behind. I wondered where y’all met and if you had fucked her, what influences you came with.

She read my mind.

“Lani this is Iver, Iver is a friend I made off Instagram.”

“Did he bring drugs?”

“Lani, did you bring something to smoke?”

I nodded. I had some grass so I processed it in silence on the black dresser at the corner of the room. You looked indifferent and bored. I was curious about how you ticked; I wanted to get inside your head.

After I was done I gave it to you but you said you wouldn’t toke until you saw food, some Americana nonsense. She laughed and said that was how you were. No food so you lay down and pressed on your phone idly until we ordered some.

I visited often but you ignored me and I ignored you too. Fast forward, I can’t spend time talking.

Do you remember the time I was over and she went into the kitchen for food, and suddenly you walked across the room from where you sat and kissed me? But could we have told her? We picked a lie, trust in it.

I’m okay, apart from her nothing much.

I missed you when you left to Abuja. I asked when you’d be back and if you were good. She said you had things to clear up. One random afternoon she called and said you were home and I could come.

You were asleep when I arrived; she said you were tired from the trip. I kissed your cheek and sat at the edge of the bed. I remember the way you smiled when you woke and saw me.

You freshened up and met me outside; I was smoking. We stood there and shot the breeze about experiences from your last trip. You looked happy to be back.

It was good we stuck to the lie that it was all a mistake. Who know where hands wander to? She bought it, calm down. As far as we said if we ever touched ourselves like that it wasn’t premeditated. We were very sorry for the error.

I know right, if we really were we will have told everything.

About that day you called me to come over and chill. She was out of the house and wouldn’t be back soon, everything that happened did.

I don’t know what gave me the courage to kiss you like that. It escalated, me breathing and squeezing you in, you kissing all over my face, moaning. We got naked. I doubt it mattered that you called out her name and asked me to stop. I would have but everything went wavy after that.

It can’t happen again. She had been through a lot before she met you; it was bad. Before she left she said she can never trust us. She knew.